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post #1 of 14 (permalink) Old 11-03-2007, 08:18 PM Thread Starter
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Who is it?

I posted this in another thread and no one made a guess to who it is. Any takers on a guess of who wrote this?

It was the blackest night
There was no moon in sight
You know the stars ain't shinin'
'Cause the sky's too tight
I heard the scarey wind
I seen some ugly trees
There was a werewolf honkin'
'Long the aide of me

I'm mean 'n I'm bad, y'know I ain't no sissy
Got a big titty girly by the name of Chrissy
Talkin' about her 'n my bike 'n me . . .
'N this ride up the Mountain of Mystery, mystery

I noticed even the crickets
Was actin' weird up here
So I figured I might
Just drink a little beer
I said, "Gimme summa that what yer suckin' on . . "
But there was no reply
'Cause she was gone . . .

"Where's those titties I like so well,
'n' my godam beer!"
Is what I started to yell, then I heard this noise
Like a crunchin' twig, 'n up jumped the Devil, . .
He's about this big, . .

He had a red suit on
An' a widow's peak
An' then a pointed tail
'N like a sulphur reek
Yes, it was him awright,
I swear I knowed it was
He had some human flesh
Stuck underneath his claws
You know, it looked to me
Like it was titty skin
I said, "You sonofabifch!"
'Cause I was mad at him.
Well he just got out the floss
'N started cleanin' his fang
So I shot him with my shooter.
Said: BANG BANG BANG

The sucker just laughed 'n said, "Put it away . . .
You know, I ate her all up . . . now what you gonna say?"
YOU ATE MY CHRISSY? "Yeah! titties 'n all!"
WHAT ABOUT THE BEER THEN? "Were the cans this tall?"
EVEN HER BOOTS? "Would I lie to you?"
SHIT, YOU MUSTA BEEN HUNGRY! "Yes, this is true'.
'WELL DON'T THEY PAY Y'ALL GOOD FOR THE
STUFF THAT YOU DO?
"I can't complain when the checks come through . . ''
WELL I WANT MY CHRISSY, 'N I WANT MY BEER
SO YOU JUST BARF IT BACK UP NOW, DEVIL,
DO YOU HEAR!
"Blow it out your ass, motorcycle man! I am fhe Devil,
Do you understand?
Just what will you give me for your titties and beer?
I suppose you noticed this little contract here, . ''
YER GODDAM RIGHT, YOU SON-OF-A-WHORE,
THAT'S ABOUT THE ONLY REASON
I LEARNED WRITIN' FOR . . .
GIMME THAT PAPER ... BET YER ASS
I'LL SIGN . . . 'CAUSE I NEED A BEER, 'N IT'S TITTY-
SQUEEZIN' TIME!

"You can't fool me, man . . . you ain't that bad . . .
I mean you shoulda seen some of fhe souls I had . . .
Why there was Milhous Nixon 'n Agnew too . . .
'n both of fhose suckers was worse 'n you . .
"WELL, LET'S MAKE A DEAL IF YOU THINK THAT'S TRUE
I MEAN, YOU'RE THE DEVIL SO ... WHATCHA GONNA DO?

(improvised dialog)

"No! Don't sign it! Give me time to think ...
I mean ... hold on a minute, boy . . . that's
Magic Ink!"

And then the Devil puked
'N out jumped m'girl
They heard the titties PLOP-PLOPPIN'
All around the world, she said:
"I GOT ME THREE BEERS 'N A FIST FULLA DOWNS,
AN' I'M GONNA GET WRECKED, SO FUCK YOU CLOWNS!"

And then she gave us the finger,
It was rigid 'n stiff,
That's when the Devil, he farted
An' she went right over the cliff
The Devil was mad took off to my pad
I swear I do declare!
How did she get back there?
I swear I do declare!
How did she get back there?
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post #2 of 14 (permalink) Old 11-03-2007, 08:46 PM
T-MINUS
 
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I have no clue....

1/19/09, the last day of Free America.
Pericles "Freedom is the sure possession of those alone who have the courage to defend it. "

"[T]he people alone have an incontestable, unalienable, and indefeasible right to institute government and to reform, alter, or totally change the same when their protection, safety, prosperity, and happiness require it." --Samuel Adams


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post #3 of 14 (permalink) Old 11-04-2007, 01:17 AM
You never go full retard
 
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Frank Zappa - Tittys and Beer

Over five thousand years ago, Moses said to the children of Israel, "Pick up your shovel, mount your asses and camels, and I will lead you to the Promised Land." Nearly 75 years ago, Roosevelt said,"Lay down your shovels, sit on your asses, and light up a camel, this is the Promised Land." Now Obama has stolen your shovel..., taxed your asses, raised the price of camels and mortgaged the Promised Land!
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post #4 of 14 (permalink) Old 11-04-2007, 10:15 AM Thread Starter
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Quote:
Originally Posted by MotoMan
Frank Zappa - Tittys and Beer
We have a winner!
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post #5 of 14 (permalink) Old 11-04-2007, 12:25 PM
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post #6 of 14 (permalink) Old 11-04-2007, 06:32 PM Thread Starter
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Quote:
Originally Posted by openroadracer3
Freakin Frank Zappa repost? What are the odds?
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post #7 of 14 (permalink) Old 11-04-2007, 07:53 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by BlackSnake1996
Freakin Frank Zappa repost? What are the odds?
LMAO... you gotta remember you aren't the only old hippie on this board.

it pisses me off i didn't see it before motoman got it.

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post #8 of 14 (permalink) Old 11-04-2007, 11:51 PM
You never go full retard
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by openroadracer3
LMAO... you gotta remember you aren't the only old hippie on this board.

it pisses me off i didn't see it before motoman got it.
Haha.... and i'm the young smartass college kid too.

Over five thousand years ago, Moses said to the children of Israel, "Pick up your shovel, mount your asses and camels, and I will lead you to the Promised Land." Nearly 75 years ago, Roosevelt said,"Lay down your shovels, sit on your asses, and light up a camel, this is the Promised Land." Now Obama has stolen your shovel..., taxed your asses, raised the price of camels and mortgaged the Promised Land!
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post #9 of 14 (permalink) Old 11-05-2007, 06:16 AM Thread Starter
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Quote:
Originally Posted by MotoMan
Haha.... and i'm the young smartass college kid too.
Did you know it or google it up?
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post #10 of 14 (permalink) Old 11-05-2007, 12:09 PM
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Thumbs up

Quote:
Originally Posted by MotoMan
Haha.... and i'm the young smartass college kid too.
nothing wrong with that!

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post #11 of 14 (permalink) Old 11-05-2007, 04:06 PM
You never go full retard
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by BlackSnake1996
Did you know it or google it up?
<--- Big Frank Zappa fan.

Over five thousand years ago, Moses said to the children of Israel, "Pick up your shovel, mount your asses and camels, and I will lead you to the Promised Land." Nearly 75 years ago, Roosevelt said,"Lay down your shovels, sit on your asses, and light up a camel, this is the Promised Land." Now Obama has stolen your shovel..., taxed your asses, raised the price of camels and mortgaged the Promised Land!
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post #12 of 14 (permalink) Old 11-05-2007, 05:47 PM Thread Starter
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Quote:
Originally Posted by MotoMan
<--- Big Frank Zappa fan.
I use to have a stack of records about 8ft tall that included all of Frank Zappa's. I even had several duplicates that the seal was never opened. Some fookers broke into my house when I lived in Arlington and stole every one of them.
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post #13 of 14 (permalink) Old 11-05-2007, 08:18 PM
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i poked and stroked till my wrist got numb... but i still didn't hear no Dinah-Moe hum.

spent my childhood listening mainly to apostrophe' and overnight sensation. oh yeah, and joes garage and weasles ripped my flesh as well as sheik yorbutie(sp?).

zappa was and will always be one of a kind.

dweezle just came through town or is coming soon and he's doing all FZ stuff.

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post #14 of 14 (permalink) Old 11-06-2007, 12:44 PM Thread Starter
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Quote:
Originally Posted by openroadracer3
i poked and stroked till my wrist got numb... but i still didn't hear no Dinah-Moe hum.

spent my childhood listening mainly to apostrophe' and overnight sensation. oh yeah, and joes garage and weasles ripped my flesh as well as sheik yorbutie(sp?).

zappa was and will always be one of a kind.

dweezle just came through town or is coming soon and he's doing all FZ stuff.
You cant find it? (Dinah-Moe hum) I'll have to look later. I'm fixin to head out for some duck.
That dude was a solid acid trip mofo.
And LMAO @ Dweezle and Moon. Only Frank man.
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