im looking for something to carry with me while in my car and then just put it in my waist band when i get out, dont want anything heavy but i know i want a .45, something like the pro carry II, but that colt defender really catches my eye
First, please don't just tuck anything in your waistband. Research, then buy a proper holster so you don't have any problems or issues.
The ProCarry II and the Defender are two completely different things. If you're looking for a concealed weapon in the commander size, I'd recommend either a Colt lightweight commander or Smith & Wesson's version of the lightweight commander. Both come with a 4.25" barrel and use aluminum parts to lighten the load.
If you like the smaller Defender size, the STI Escort is also a nice option. When you drop down to the 3" barrel you get a lot more muzzle flip. That's a big factor on the range, but if you're busy defending yourself, I could really care less how much the muzzle flips as long as the bad guy leaves me alone.
Then we can get into how you're going to carry. IWB, OWB, shoulder harness, tuckable? Standard grip, officers grip, bobtail grip?
Personally, my vote is buy one of each. Because you can't own just one 1911.