DRAG RACING GRANDPA
A hip young man goes out and buys the best car available:
a brand new Ferrari GTO. It is also the most expensive
car in the world, and it costs him $500,000. He takes it
out for a spin and stops for a red light. An old man on
a moped (looking about 75 years old) pulls up next to
him. The old man looks over at the sleek, shiny car and
asks, "What kind of car ya' got there, sonny?"
The young man replies, "A Ferrari GTO. It cost half a
That's a lot of money," says the old man. "Why does it
cost so much?"
"Because this car can do up to 320 miles an hour!" states
the young dude proudly.
The moped driver asks, "Mind if I take a look inside?"
"No problem," replies the owner.
So the old man pokes his head in the window and looks
around. Then sitting back on his moped, the old man says,
"That's a pretty nice car, all right... but I'll stick
with my moped!"
Just then the light changes so the guy decides to show
the old man just what this car can do. He floors it, and
within 30 seconds the speedometer reads 160 mph. Suddenly,
he notices a dot in his rear view mirror.
It seems to be getting closer! He slows down to see what
it could be and suddenly, whhhoooossshhh! Something whips
by him, going much faster!!!!
"What on earth could be going faster than my Ferrari?!"
the young man asks himself. He floors the accelerator and
takes the Ferrari up to 250 mph.
Then, up ahead of him, he sees that it's the old man on
the moped. Amazed that the moped could pass his Ferrari he
gives it some more gas and passes the moped at 275 mph.
Whoooooosh! He's feeling pretty good until he looks in his
mirror and sees the old man gaining on him again.
Astounded by the speed of this old guy he floors the gas
pedal and takes the Ferrari all the way up to 320 mph.
Not ten seconds later he sees the moped bearing down on
him again. The Ferrari is flat out and there's nothing
he can do.
Suddenly the moped plows into the back of his Ferrari,
demolishing the rear end. The young man jumps out, and
unbelievably, the old man is still alive!!! He runs up to
the mangled man and says, "Oh my God! Is there anything
I can do for you?"
The old man whispers with his dying breath, "Unhook my
suspenders from your side-view mirror!"