The best spam in the world
FORWARD THIS TO EVERYONE YOU KNOW!
I am a very sick little boy. My mother is typing this for me, because I can't. She is crying. Don't cry, Mommy! Mommy is always sad, but she
says it's not my fault. I asked her if it was God's fault, but she didn't answer, and only started crying harder, so I don't ask her that
anymore. The reason she is so sad is that I'm so sick. I was born without a body. It doesn't hurt, except when I go to sleep.
The doctors gave me an artificial body. My body is a burlap bag filled with leaves. The doctors said that was the best they could do on
account of us havin' no money or insurance. I would like to have a body transplant, but we need more money. Mommy doesn't work
because she said employers don't hire crying people. I said, "Don't cry, Mommy," and she hugged my burlap body. Mommy always gives
me hugs, even though she's allergic to burlap, and it chafes her real bad.
I hope you will help me. You can help me if you forward this e-mail. Dr. Johansen said if you foward this e-mail to NASA the astronauts
will collect prayers from school children all over America and take them up to space so that the angels can hear them better. Then they
will go to the Pope, and he will take up a collection in church and send the money to the doctors. The doctors could help me better
Maybe one day I will be able to play baseball. Or maybe just use my lungs and heart, when the doctors make them. The doctors said
that every time you foward this letter, the astronauts can take another prayer to the angels. Please help me. Mommy is so sad, and I
want a body. I don't want my leaves to rot before I turn 10.
If you don't foward this e-mail, that's OK. Mommy says you're a mean heartless person who doesn't care about a poor little boy with only
a head. She says that she hopes that you stew in the raw pit of your own guilt-ridden stomach. What kind of wretched person are you
that you can't take five lousy minutes to forward this to all your friends so that they can feel guilt and shame for the rest of their day, and
then maybe help a poor, bodiless nine-year-old boy?
Please help me. This really sucks. I try to be happy but it's hard. I wish I had a puppy. I wish I could hold a puppy.
Billy 'Smiles' Evans,
The boy with just a head. And a burlap sack for a body.
PS: I just got an email from Walt Disney Jr. He said that Mommy and I can get a trip to Disneyland if enough people forward this email.
Please help me.
Mostly stock 89LX hatchback
I'm diagonally parked in a parallel universe