Probably old ones, but here thet are.... - DFWstangs Forums
 
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post #1 of 4 (permalink) Old 04-27-2009, 11:20 AM Thread Starter
Lifer
 
Join Date: Jul 2002
Posts: 2,506
Probably old ones, but here thet are....

These got emailed to me and I've heard a few b4, but some are new to me.





Q. What is the difference between a drug dealer and a hooker?

A. A hooker can wash her crack and sell it again.

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Q. What's a mixed feeling?

A. When you see your mother-in-law backing off a cliff in your new car.

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Q What's the height of conceit?

A. Having an orgasm and calling out your own name.

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Q. What's the definition of macho?

A. Jogging home from your vasectomy.

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Q.. What's the difference between a G-Spot and a golf ball?

A. A guy will actually search for a golf ball

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Q. Do you know how New Zealanders practice safe sex?

A. They spray paint X's on the back of the sheep that kick!

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Q.Why is divorce so expensive?

A. Because it's worth it!

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Q. What is a Yankee?

A. The same as a quickie, but a guy can do it alone.

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Q.. What do Tupperware and a walrus have in common?

A. They both like a tight seal.

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Q. What do a Christmas tree and a priest have in common?

A. Their balls are just for decoration.

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Q.What is the difference between 'ooooooh'and 'aaaaaaah'?

A. About three inches.

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Q: What's the difference between purple and pink?

A. The grip.

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Q. How do you find a blind man in a nudist colony?

A. It's not hard.

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Q: How do you circumcise a hillbilly?

A: Kick his sister in the jaw.

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Q: What's the difference between a girlfriend and a wife?

A: 45 pounds.

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Q: What's the difference between a boyfriend and a husband?

A: 45 minutes.

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Q: Why do men find it difficult to make eye contact?

A: Breasts don't have eyes.

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Q: If the dove is the bird of peace, what is the bird of true love?

A.. The swallow.

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Q: What is the difference between medium and rare?

A: Six inches is medium, eight inches is rare.
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Q. Why do women rub their eyes when they get up in the morning?
A . They don't have balls to scratch!
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post #2 of 4 (permalink) Old 04-27-2009, 11:28 AM
Loves the Haterz!!
 
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Location: royse city
Posts: 12,228
LMAO..good stuff

Wake up and smell the Taco



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I just crave meat...so any of those places is always good to me

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I never got the "talk" from either of my parents
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post #3 of 4 (permalink) Old 04-29-2009, 12:10 PM
insert something aqui
 
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Location: grand prairie
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great stuff

1991 lx 5.0

lil ol 302

Back In The Jackstand Racing Crew!
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post #4 of 4 (permalink) Old 04-29-2009, 12:22 PM
LUCIFER
 
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Definitely some classics there

2004 GT Conv't

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FLOWS, 3.73'S, BASSANI O/R X-PIPE, ACCUFAB 75MM TB, PLENUM, AND VORTECH V-3 SUPERCHARGED


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