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post #1 of 11 (permalink) Old 02-10-2009, 01:21 AM
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Union Worker

A dedicated union worker was attending a convention in Las Vegas and, as you would expect, decided to check out the local brothels nearby. When he got to the first one, he asked the madam, "Is this a union house?"

"No," she replied, "I'm sorry it isn't."

"Well, if I pay you $100, what cut do the girls get?"

"The house gets $80 and the girls get $20."

Mightily offended at such unfair dealings, the man stomped off down the street in search of a more equitable, hopefully unionized shop.

His search continued until finally he reached a brothel where the Madame responded, "Why yes sir, this IS a union house."

The man asked, "And if I pay you $100, what cut do the girls get?"

"The girls get $80 and the house gets $20."

"That's more like it!" the man said. He looked around the room and pointed to a stunningly attractive blonde. "I'd like her for the night."

"I'm sure you would, sir," said the Madame, then, gesturing to an obese fifty-five year old woman in the corner, "but Ethel here has seniority."
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post #2 of 11 (permalink) Old 02-10-2009, 01:30 AM
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a young kid finally got a union job as a dock worker... on his first day a long-time worker was showing him the ropes... they were standing around and the old timer was filling him in on the ins and outs of the job, how to deal with management, where the break room was, where the designated smoking areas were... just kinda helping familiarize him with the job...

all of a sudden, the old-timer saw a snail a few feet away crawling along slower than an old lady behind a walker. He quickly went over and squashed the snail with his boot and came back to continue the conversation

the new kid asked "what's the deal with the snails?"

to which the old timer replied "you gotta kill those fuckers whenever you see them... they move so fast, they make us look bad!!!"
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post #3 of 11 (permalink) Old 02-10-2009, 01:35 AM
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meanwhile... you get a pass because you hadn't joined at the time, but...

https://www.dfwstangs.net/forums/showthread.php?t=278610
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post #4 of 11 (permalink) Old 02-10-2009, 02:14 AM
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meanwhile... you get a pass because you hadn't joined at the time, but...

https://www.dfwstangs.net/forums/showthread.php?t=278610
you remember a 2006 non-replied to thread and in the joke section no less? lol...

Keepin' The Old School Alive
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post #5 of 11 (permalink) Old 02-10-2009, 02:29 AM
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you remember a 2006 non-replied to thread and in the joke section no less? lol...
I have a retardely selective memory... drives my wife fucking crazy

I won't remember something that happened two days ago, but I'll remember some random shit that happened 15yrs ago like it was yesterday
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post #6 of 11 (permalink) Old 02-10-2009, 02:42 AM
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I have a retardely selective memory... drives my wife fucking crazy

I won't remember something that happened two days ago, but I'll remember some random shit that happened 15yrs ago like it was yesterday
haha i see...
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post #7 of 11 (permalink) Old 02-10-2009, 03:06 PM
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lol wow. either way still funny...never heard it before
post #8 of 11 (permalink) Old 02-10-2009, 04:57 PM
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I have a retardely selective memory... drives my wife fucking crazy

I won't remember something that happened two days ago, but I'll remember some random shit that happened 15yrs ago like it was yesterday
How many toothpicks?


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post #9 of 11 (permalink) Old 02-13-2009, 03:53 PM
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How many toothpicks?

46, deffinately 46
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post #10 of 11 (permalink) Old 02-14-2009, 04:03 PM
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How many toothpicks?

I watched rainman last night, actually, and I can't remember how many there were... 236?
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post #11 of 11 (permalink) Old 02-14-2009, 04:05 PM
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how many toothpicks?

lol!
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