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post #1 of 66 (permalink) Old 06-22-2008, 07:04 PM Thread Starter
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a drunk and his clock

A drunk was proudly showing off his new apartment to a couple of his friends late one night. He led the way to his bedroom where there was a big brass gong and a mallet.

"What's that big brass gong?" one of the guests asked.

"It's not a gong. It's a talking clock," the drunk replied.

"A talking clock? Seriously?" asked his astonished friend.

"Yup," replied the drunk.

"How's it work?" the friend asked, squinting at it.

"Watch," the drunk replied.

He picked up the mallet, gave the gong an ear-shattering pound, and stepped back.

The three stood looking at one another for a moment.......

Suddenly; someone on the other side of the wall screamed . . . .
"You a**-hole: It's three-fifteen in the m
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post #2 of 66 (permalink) Old 06-22-2008, 07:08 PM
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lol
what a dumbas*

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Check your self bro , you're not that cool.

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post #3 of 66 (permalink) Old 06-22-2008, 10:46 PM
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pretty good.

its still "we the people"right?

"So this is how democracy dies, with thunderous applause"

"a lesson lived is a lesson learned, everyday is a lesson."

obama is a man made disaster
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post #4 of 66 (permalink) Old 06-23-2008, 09:50 AM
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haha unexpected

04 converted V8
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post #5 of 66 (permalink) Old 06-23-2008, 10:01 AM
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Lol

2004 GT Conv't

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FLOWS, 3.73'S, BASSANI O/R X-PIPE, ACCUFAB 75MM TB, PLENUM, AND VORTECH V-3 SUPERCHARGED


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post #6 of 66 (permalink) Old 06-24-2008, 07:57 AM
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I can dig it...
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post #7 of 66 (permalink) Old 06-24-2008, 10:28 AM
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lmao...read it 3times but got it!
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post #8 of 66 (permalink) Old 06-24-2008, 12:37 PM
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lol


greatness

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lil ol 302

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post #9 of 66 (permalink) Old 06-24-2008, 01:03 PM
 
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lolz
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post #10 of 66 (permalink) Old 06-24-2008, 01:09 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by 03darkshadow
lmao...read it 3times but got it!
Youre really not that bright, are you?

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post #11 of 66 (permalink) Old 06-24-2008, 04:25 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by 347Mike
Youre really not that bright, are you?
Sharp as a bowling ball.

┌∩┐(-_-)┌∩┐
That's directed at you, UHHHbama
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post #12 of 66 (permalink) Old 06-24-2008, 10:58 PM
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Originally Posted by CoorsLightCoupe
Sharp as a bowling ball.
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post #13 of 66 (permalink) Old 06-25-2008, 01:05 AM
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She sho is pretty though!
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post #14 of 66 (permalink) Old 06-25-2008, 02:01 AM
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Originally Posted by Skidmark
She sho is pretty though!
Meh...


Quote:
Originally Posted by DON SVO View Post
Women: vaginal life support.
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post #15 of 66 (permalink) Old 06-25-2008, 09:23 AM
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Originally Posted by That_Is_My_El_Camino
Meh...
whatever tony!!
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post #16 of 66 (permalink) Old 06-25-2008, 04:29 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by 03darkshadow
whatever tony!!
I meant that in the most joking sarcastic way possible.

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post #17 of 66 (permalink) Old 06-25-2008, 07:39 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by 03darkshadow
whatever tony!!
Quote:
Originally Posted by 347Mike
I meant that in the most joking sarcastic way possible.
Pussy. If I'd said that, it would have been in the most serious, sincere, and honest way possible.

In fact, Jen, you're not very bright, are you?


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Women: vaginal life support.
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post #18 of 66 (permalink) Old 06-25-2008, 09:21 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by 347Mike
I meant that in the most joking sarcastic way possible.
hey you how u doin??!

tony ur an a$$!
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post #19 of 66 (permalink) Old 06-25-2008, 09:24 PM
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But you like my ass.


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Women: vaginal life support.
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post #20 of 66 (permalink) Old 06-25-2008, 09:28 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by That_Is_My_El_Camino
But you like my ass.
.......LMAO!

hey post a joke up and see if i get it!
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post #21 of 66 (permalink) Old 06-25-2008, 09:30 PM
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K, I'll give you an easy one:

A drunk was proudly showing off his new apartment to a couple of his friends late one night. He led the way to his bedroom where there was a big brass gong and a mallet.

"What's that big brass gong?" one of the guests asked.

"It's not a gong. It's a talking clock," the drunk replied.

"A talking clock? Seriously?" asked his astonished friend.

"Yup," replied the drunk.

"How's it work?" the friend asked, squinting at it.

"Watch," the drunk replied.

He picked up the mallet, gave the gong an ear-shattering pound, and stepped back.

The three stood looking at one another for a moment.......

Suddenly; someone on the other side of the wall screamed . . . .
"You a**-hole: It's three-fifteen in the morning!"

Did you get it?


Quote:
Originally Posted by DON SVO View Post
Women: vaginal life support.
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post #22 of 66 (permalink) Old 06-25-2008, 09:33 PM
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OMG, be seriouse you made me read that whole thing for nothing!
Of course i got it! That's the one i had to read 3times.

.......NEXT!
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post #23 of 66 (permalink) Old 06-25-2008, 09:35 PM
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You read the whole thing again instead of stopping after the first line or two? LMAO! Sharp as a bowling ball, for sure!


Quote:
Originally Posted by DON SVO View Post
Women: vaginal life support.
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post #24 of 66 (permalink) Old 06-25-2008, 09:39 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by That_Is_My_El_Camino
You read the whole thing again instead of stopping after the first line or two? LMAO! Sharp as a bowling ball, for sure!
...I knew it sound familiar but i thaught you might have changed the ending to it!..lol fuck bowling balls dammit you sir can kiss my a$$
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post #25 of 66 (permalink) Old 06-25-2008, 09:43 PM
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I'll bet you'd like that, wouldn't you?


Quote:
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Women: vaginal life support.
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post #26 of 66 (permalink) Old 06-25-2008, 09:47 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by That_Is_My_El_Camino
I'll bet you'd like that, wouldn't you?
sry my friend only ONE person in here can do that.....o and yes I do like!



post up a joke!
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post #27 of 66 (permalink) Old 06-25-2008, 09:48 PM
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Check your myspace, hooker.


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Women: vaginal life support.
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post #28 of 66 (permalink) Old 06-25-2008, 09:49 PM
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Exclamation

Quote:
Originally Posted by 03darkshadow
sry my friend only ONE person in here can do that.....o and yes I do like!



post up a joke!
me?? hahaa
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post #29 of 66 (permalink) Old 06-25-2008, 09:59 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by That_Is_My_El_Camino
Check your myspace, hooker.
what's an elk?..it would help if i knew what that was.
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post #30 of 66 (permalink) Old 06-25-2008, 10:01 PM
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what's an elk?..it would help if i knew what that was.
It's like a deer, only bigger, and different.


Quote:
Originally Posted by DON SVO View Post
Women: vaginal life support.
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post #31 of 66 (permalink) Old 06-25-2008, 10:06 PM
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It's like a deer, only bigger, and different.
o0o0o...haha got it!
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post #32 of 66 (permalink) Old 06-25-2008, 10:09 PM
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Uh huh. I'm sure you did.


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Women: vaginal life support.
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post #33 of 66 (permalink) Old 06-25-2008, 10:52 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by 03darkshadow
o0o0o...haha got it!
So if i organize a gtg at your Hooters do we get the hook up?

(Tony youre not invited)....

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post #34 of 66 (permalink) Old 06-25-2008, 10:53 PM
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Exclamation

Quote:
Originally Posted by 347Mike
So if i organize a gtg at your Hooters do we get the hook up?

(Tony youre not invited)....
She quit.
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post #35 of 66 (permalink) Old 06-25-2008, 10:54 PM
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She wasn't Hooters material?


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Women: vaginal life support.
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post #36 of 66 (permalink) Old 06-25-2008, 10:55 PM
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She quit.

False advertisement FTL!

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post #37 of 66 (permalink) Old 06-25-2008, 11:29 PM
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False advertisement FTL!
sorry guys!
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post #38 of 66 (permalink) Old 06-26-2008, 08:52 AM
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She doesn't work at Hooters any more, but she still loves hooters. Lipstick lesbians FTW.


Quote:
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Women: vaginal life support.
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post #39 of 66 (permalink) Old 06-26-2008, 09:00 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by That_Is_My_El_Camino
She doesn't work at Hooters any more, but she still loves hooters. Lipstick lesbians FTW.
I quit workin there only 3weeks ago soo of course i still love it!

*I don't get it "lipstick lesbians FTW"??
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post #40 of 66 (permalink) Old 06-26-2008, 09:05 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by 03darkshadow
I quit workin there only 3weeks ago soo of course i still love it!

*I don't get it "lipstick lesbians FTW"??
He tried making a funny. /Fail
Im surprise you still havent 'toned' him out yet.

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post #41 of 66 (permalink) Old 06-26-2008, 09:08 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by 03darkshadow
*I don't get it "lipstick lesbians FTW"??
This is my not surprised face. -->


Quote:
Originally Posted by DON SVO View Post
Women: vaginal life support.
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post #42 of 66 (permalink) Old 06-26-2008, 09:15 AM
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Quote:
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This is my not surprised face. -->
..well??..explain!
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post #43 of 66 (permalink) Old 06-26-2008, 09:19 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by 03darkshadow
..well??..explain!
I said you don't work at Hooters anymore, but that you still love hooters (as in breasts, boobs, tits, jugs, et cetera, et cetera, et cetera). Do you need me to continue?


Quote:
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Women: vaginal life support.
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post #44 of 66 (permalink) Old 06-26-2008, 09:24 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by That_Is_My_El_Camino
I said you don't work at Hooters anymore, but that you still love hooters (as in breasts, boobs, tits, jugs, et cetera, et cetera, et cetera). Do you need me to continue?
lol no sir I got it....but next time just pm that shit to me!
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post #45 of 66 (permalink) Old 06-26-2008, 09:27 AM
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If i didnt know any better id say Tony is following you around. I think Tony has a e-crush....

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post #46 of 66 (permalink) Old 06-26-2008, 09:29 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by 347Mike
If i didnt know any better id say Tony is following you around. I think Tony has a e-crush....
tony?....are u following me around??
he's just looking for every reason to prove im a ditz .....but it's not workin lol
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post #47 of 66 (permalink) Old 06-26-2008, 09:32 AM
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Meh Lol
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post #48 of 66 (permalink) Old 06-26-2008, 09:33 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by 03darkshadow
tony?....are u following me around??
he's just looking for every reason to prove im a ditz .....but it's not workin lol
I'm not following you around, nor am I doing anything to prove you're a ditz. You're doing beautifully all on your own.


Quote:
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Women: vaginal life support.
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post #49 of 66 (permalink) Old 06-26-2008, 09:46 AM
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I'm not following you around, nor am I doing anything to prove you're a ditz. You're doing beautifully all on your own.
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post #50 of 66 (permalink) Old 06-26-2008, 09:48 AM
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Quote:
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Women: vaginal life support.
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