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post #1 of 92 (permalink) Old 11-16-2007, 11:50 PM Thread Starter
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Cowboys jokes

Q: What do you call 47 millionaires around a TV watching the SuperBowl?
A: The Cowboys.

Q: How do you keep the Cowboys out of your yard?
A: Put up goal posts.

Q: Where do you go in Dallas , Texas, in case of a tornado?
A: Cowboy Stadium - they never get a touchdown there!

Q: What do you call Cowboys with a Super Bowl ring?
A: Thieves.

Q: Why was Wade Phillips upset when the Cowboys playbook was stolen?
A: Because he hadn't finished coloring it.

Q: What's the difference between the Cowboys and a dollar bill?
A: You can still get four quarters out of a dollar bill.

Q: What do the Cowboys and possums have in common?
A: Both play dead at home and get killed on the road.
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post #2 of 92 (permalink) Old 11-17-2007, 12:14 AM
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Old as hell and does not apply currently.

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post #3 of 92 (permalink) Old 11-17-2007, 12:22 AM
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LOLz, not this year...


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post #4 of 92 (permalink) Old 11-17-2007, 08:04 AM
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I take it he's not a fan of da Boys??
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post #5 of 92 (permalink) Old 11-17-2007, 08:06 AM
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*yawn*
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post #6 of 92 (permalink) Old 11-17-2007, 10:18 AM
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Today in class all of the kids are going to tell there teacher what their dads do for a living. Well, little Bobby went first. "My dads a doctor and makes lots of money." Next was little Billy. "My dads a lawyer and he also makes lots of money." Now it was little Timmy's turn but he just sat there and said nothing. His teacher was like "Timmy tell us what your dad does." "Nah, I don't want to." "Come on Timmy, be apart of the class." "Well, OK... my dad is a gay stripper for a gay strip club at night, dances on men's laps and sometimes he will go in the alley and have sex with them for extra money." Right away the teacher changed the subject and told the kids to go to recess. She told Timmy to come here and she asked him why he said that. "I am embarrassed of what my dad does for a living." "Yes, but what could be worse than what you just said." "He's plays for the Dallas Cowboys."

┌∩┐(-_-)┌∩┐
That's directed at you, UHHHbama
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post #7 of 92 (permalink) Old 11-17-2007, 10:28 AM
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i'm really confused.

none of those are remotely true

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post #8 of 92 (permalink) Old 11-17-2007, 10:51 AM
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yea, that would be really funny if they weren't doing good this year.

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post #9 of 92 (permalink) Old 11-17-2007, 02:16 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by sig239
QQ: Where do you go in Dallas , Texas, in case of a tornado?
A: Cowboy Stadium - they never get a touchdown there!

Q: What do you call Cowboys with a Super Bowl ring?
A: Thieves.
Texas Stadium

Refer to Super Bowls XI, XII, XXVII, XVIII, and XXX.

n/a
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post #10 of 92 (permalink) Old 11-17-2007, 02:18 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by SVT Lurch
Texas Stadium

Refer to Super Bowls XI, XII, XXVII, XVIII, and XXX.
they are shithead haters...let them be

that's probably all they have to look forward to...
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post #11 of 92 (permalink) Old 11-17-2007, 04:09 PM
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Cowboys suck...................GO Italians

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post #12 of 92 (permalink) Old 11-17-2007, 06:46 PM Thread Starter
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I like the boys as much as the next guy, just thought it was funny.
But you know when it comes down to crunch time they will fold like a cheep napkin.
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post #13 of 92 (permalink) Old 11-19-2007, 04:15 PM
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9-1


Bitches.
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post #14 of 92 (permalink) Old 11-20-2007, 11:01 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Fox466
9-1


Bitches.

your dam right hopefully 10-1 this thursday
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post #15 of 92 (permalink) Old 11-23-2007, 07:43 PM
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wtf?

190 is my autobahn
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post #16 of 92 (permalink) Old 11-24-2007, 10:37 PM
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"Insert any NFL here" in any of those jokes.

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post #17 of 92 (permalink) Old 11-25-2007, 10:59 AM
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Don't the cowboys still have the longest streak of winning (sp) seasons? like 20 from teh 60's to the 80's
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post #18 of 92 (permalink) Old 11-26-2007, 03:40 AM
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That doesn't apply to this season. Nor any other season for that matter except, maybe the year the cowboys went 1 - 15.

Quote:
Originally Posted by MR EDD View Post
it was not a problem to bring money to his house at 10pm.so why is it a problem to call and bitch.it wasnt a problem when we were all sitting around smoking pot together.yes i said it we all were smoking pot together.what now stupid.
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post #19 of 92 (permalink) Old 11-26-2007, 08:17 PM Thread Starter
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Mustangman_2000
That doesn't apply to this season. Nor any other season for that matter except, maybe the year the cowboys went 1 - 15.

I have a twenty that says they will fold in the crunch time like always.
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post #20 of 92 (permalink) Old 11-27-2007, 09:37 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by sig239
I have a twenty that says they will fold in the crunch time like always.

Like always genius ?

The cowboys have more superbowl wins than whatever team you root for. Also, the year the cowboys went 1-15, did you realize the 1 team they beat "The redskins" won the superbowl that year??

Where were you in 92,93 and 95 ?
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post #21 of 92 (permalink) Old 11-27-2007, 11:57 AM
 
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You may have to change alot of these after this year................the Green Bay
game will be a true test I think.
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post #22 of 92 (permalink) Old 11-27-2007, 11:17 PM Thread Starter
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Quote:
Originally Posted by 10sec302
Like always genius ?

The cowboys have more superbowl wins than whatever team you root for. Also, the year the cowboys went 1-15, did you realize the 1 team they beat "The redskins" won the superbowl that year??

Where were you in 92,93 and 95 ?

You taking my bet? This is 07 thats 12 years. I just have a hard time getting excited about a bunch of dumb street thugs getting paid millions to play ball. Never been to a game and never will.
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post #23 of 92 (permalink) Old 11-28-2007, 08:12 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by sig239
You taking my bet? This is 07 thats 12 years. I just have a hard time getting excited about a bunch of dumb street thugs getting paid millions to play ball. Never been to a game and never will.


It shows how much you pay attention. Dumb street thugs? You'd be surprised how smart some of those players are. Guess what, almost all of them have been to college, so theres no reason to get all fired up out of jealousy. Im sure the Dallas Cowboys organization will be just fine without your small contribution.

I'll take your bet, but you have a 31-1 favor. Why dont you pick a team that you think will go, and dont be a front-runner and pick the Patriots because they're 11-0.

You still want to lose that $20 ?
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post #24 of 92 (permalink) Old 11-28-2007, 01:37 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by SVT Lurch
Texas Stadium

Refer to Super Bowls XI, XII, XXVII, XVIII, and XXX.
XXX was stolen. Actually, it was purchased by your shithead owner.

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post #25 of 92 (permalink) Old 11-28-2007, 03:05 PM
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whatever guys, I'm about to go take the browns to the Super Bowl myself!

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post #26 of 92 (permalink) Old 11-28-2007, 08:49 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Geof
XXX was stolen. Actually, it was purchased by your shithead owner.
Am I sensing a little bit of bitterness?

I believe the term is "Look at the rings."
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post #27 of 92 (permalink) Old 12-03-2007, 06:21 PM
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10-1

bitches...





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post #28 of 92 (permalink) Old 12-03-2007, 06:28 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by 10sec302
You'd be surprised how smart some of those players are.
I guess I would be surprised, because all i see is a bunch of thugs too.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Geof
XXX was stolen. Actually, it was purchased by your shithead owner.
You sound like Tim Duncan right now. Please stop.

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post #29 of 92 (permalink) Old 12-03-2007, 07:58 PM Thread Starter
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Quote:
Originally Posted by 10sec302
It shows how much you pay attention. Dumb street thugs? You'd be surprised how smart some of those players are. Guess what, almost all of them have been to college, so theres no reason to get all fired up out of jealousy. Im sure the Dallas Cowboys organization will be just fine without your small contribution.

I'll take your bet, but you have a 31-1 favor. Why dont you pick a team that you think will go, and dont be a front-runner and pick the Patriots because they're 11-0.

You still want to lose that $20 ?


I bet 99.8% never cracked a book. they just went to play ball. Most cant even read.

And I still say they will have a good season but fold in the play offs.
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post #30 of 92 (permalink) Old 12-03-2007, 09:25 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Fox466
10-1

bitches..
what happened to 11-1?

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post #31 of 92 (permalink) Old 12-06-2007, 12:23 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by sig239
I bet 99.8% never cracked a book. they just went to play ball. Most cant even read.

And I still say they will have a good season but fold in the play offs.

First of all, if they make it to the play-offs, that means a they did better than a lot of other teams, correct ?

And its easy to say that ANY team that doesnt make it to the superbowl folded in the play-offs. That includes 30 teams, so there went your little theory.

And your figures are simply figured in that head of yours. 99.8% ? lol, show me some stats. Most college football players wont even enter the draft until their Senior or Junior year, so Id say its pretty hard to go to college for 3-4 years if you cant read.

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post #32 of 92 (permalink) Old 12-06-2007, 10:05 PM Thread Starter
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Just goggle NFL players in jail. Yep upstanding folks you like nut hugging.
Its common knowledge they get paid to go to school where the hell you been? That shits been going on for ever. Like the school is going to not pass there players. The alumni would jerk there money out of that school so fast there heads would spin.
http://nflcrimes.blogspot.com Here keep track of your hero's here.
http://www.irishroundtable.com/?p=938

http://blogs.guardian.co.uk/sport/20..._us_colle.html
78% of them after there career is is over end up broke or in jail from there hood life style.
http://asp.usatoday.com/community/ut...13366354.story

Last edited by sig239; 12-06-2007 at 10:35 PM.
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post #33 of 92 (permalink) Old 12-07-2007, 09:24 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by sig239
Just goggle NFL players in jail. Yep upstanding folks you like nut hugging.
Its common knowledge they get paid to go to school where the hell you been? That shits been going on for ever. Like the school is going to not pass there players. The alumni would jerk there money out of that school so fast there heads would spin.
http://nflcrimes.blogspot.com Here keep track of your hero's here.
http://www.irishroundtable.com/?p=938

http://blogs.guardian.co.uk/sport/20..._us_colle.html
78% of them after there career is is over end up broke or in jail from there hood life style.
http://asp.usatoday.com/community/ut...13366354.story

Oh, and only NFL players committ crimes and do things illegal right?
You can pull up just about any profession and there will be something that players have done illegal........so my question to you, is where the hell have you been ? I think we were talking about the Dallas Cowboys to begin with, not NFL players in general, but the fact remains you're still crying about something in the past to dislike the cowboys. Its ok though, we have 5 superbowl rings, does your team ?


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post #34 of 92 (permalink) Old 12-07-2007, 09:28 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by sig239
Just goggle NFL players in jail. Yep upstanding folks you like nut hugging.
Its common knowledge they get paid to go to school where the hell you been? That shits been going on for ever. Like the school is going to not pass there players. The alumni would jerk there money out of that school so fast there heads would spin.
http://nflcrimes.blogspot.com Here keep track of your hero's here.
http://www.irishroundtable.com/?p=938

http://blogs.guardian.co.uk/sport/20..._us_colle.html
78% of them after there career is is over end up broke or in jail from there hood life style.
http://asp.usatoday.com/community/ut...13366354.story

And another thing......Some retired Cowboys....

Jay Novacek............Not broke
Emmitt Smith...........Nowhere close to broke
Troy Aikman............Sorry, not broke
Michael Irving..........lol, not broke either
Deion $anders........Ummm, sorry.......he's got money too.

Oh, and Tony Romo just signed a 67 million dollar contract, so Im sure he'll boo-hoo all the way to the bank.
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post #35 of 92 (permalink) Old 12-07-2007, 09:39 AM Thread Starter
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Its more fun getting your panties all wadded up, wow six players out of hundreds. Yep real good percentage there.
And they still wont make it past the play offs.
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post #36 of 92 (permalink) Old 12-07-2007, 10:43 PM
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cowboys are going all the way bitches
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post #37 of 92 (permalink) Old 12-08-2007, 08:58 AM Thread Starter
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cowboys are going all the way bitches

I hope so, but don't tell 10sec302 that I said this. I'm having too much fun watching him jump through my hoops.
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post #38 of 92 (permalink) Old 12-10-2007, 11:45 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by sig239
I hope so, but don't tell 10sec302 that I said this. I'm having too much fun watching him jump through my hoops.

If you think your posts on the internet have me jumping through hoops, then you dont have much to look foward to throughout the day.

And to say that you "hope" the cowboys go all the way, but turn around and bet that they dont, makes you a hypocrite.
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post #39 of 92 (permalink) Old 12-10-2007, 11:52 AM
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Wink

cowboys now 12 - 1,
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post #40 of 92 (permalink) Old 12-10-2007, 12:50 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by 02gtpony
cowboys now 12 - 1,


X20
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post #41 of 92 (permalink) Old 12-10-2007, 02:43 PM Thread Starter
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I'm betting they go all the way tell the play offs, then they will fold. They do it every year, I make a killing off fools like you.
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post #42 of 92 (permalink) Old 12-10-2007, 02:44 PM
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Some of you bleeding vaginas take jokes way too seriously. Please seek help.

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post #43 of 92 (permalink) Old 12-10-2007, 03:17 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by sig239
I'm betting they go all the way tell the play offs, then they will fold. They do it every year, I make a killing off fools like you.

Wow, you're actually bragging about betting against the cowboys ? Instead of using odds like that, why dont you pick a team, and bet on them. Anyone can do what you're doing, but guess what.......there's no respect in that. Thats the difference between a true fan, and you.

Just plain sad.....
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post #44 of 92 (permalink) Old 12-10-2007, 05:44 PM Thread Starter
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Geof
Some of you bleeding vaginas take jokes way too seriously. Please seek help.
Funny ant it, All I have to do is make a post, don't mater what its about them he jumps through my hoops like a trained dog.
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post #45 of 92 (permalink) Old 12-10-2007, 05:45 PM Thread Starter
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Quote:
Originally Posted by 10sec302
Wow, you're actually bragging about betting against the cowboys ? Instead of using odds like that, why dont you pick a team, and bet on them. Anyone can do what you're doing, but guess what.......there's no respect in that. Thats the difference between a true fan, and you.

Just plain sad.....

I go where the money is, cowboys blowing the playoffs is a sure bet.
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post #46 of 92 (permalink) Old 12-11-2007, 08:35 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by sig239
I go where the money is, cowboys blowing the playoffs is a sure bet.


No, its called being a "front runner"

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post #47 of 92 (permalink) Old 12-11-2007, 08:36 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by sig239
Funny ant it, All I have to do is make a post, don't mater what its about them he jumps through my hoops like a trained dog.

Maybe you should have used some of that money you've earned for some spelling lessons....



LMAO.


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post #48 of 92 (permalink) Old 12-11-2007, 07:02 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Temple 5.0
what happened to 11-1?

Woops, my bad.



11-1 bitches! Plus one more, which actually makes it 12-1 and hopefully soon to be 13-1, but I digress...
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post #49 of 92 (permalink) Old 12-11-2007, 10:34 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Fox466
Woops, my bad.



11-1 bitches! Plus one more, which actually makes it 12-1 and hopefully soon to be 13-1, but I digress...
LOL!Was it not for the white text I was going to make a lot of fun of you.

n/a
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post #50 of 92 (permalink) Old 12-12-2007, 06:47 AM
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LOL!Was it not for the white text I was going to make a lot of fun of you.

Lmao! I knew a beatdown was coming at me without the text..
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