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post #1 of 10 (permalink) Old 07-14-2007, 10:16 PM Thread Starter
Time Served
 
Join Date: Jul 2007
Location: Greenville
Posts: 139
Blow Jobs

Blow Jobs

WHAT A GIRL HAS TO SAY ON THE SUBJECT

1. First and foremost, we are not obligated to do it.
2. Extension to rule #1 - So if you get one, be grateful.
3. I don't care WHAT they did in the porn video you saw, it is not standard practice to cum on someone's face.
4. Extension to rule #3 - No, I DON'T have to swallow.
5. My ears are NOT handles.
6. Extension to rule #5 - do not push on the top of my head. Last I heard, deep throat had been done. And additionally, do you really WANT puke on your dick?
7. I don't care HOW relaxed you get, it is NEVER OK to fart.
8. Having my period does not mean that it's 'blow job week' - get it through your head - I'm bloated and I feel like shit so no, I don't feel particularly obligated to blow you just because YOU can't have sex right now.
9. Extension to #8 - "Blue Balls" might have worked on high school girls - if you're that desperate, go jerk off and leave me alone with my Midol.
10. If I have to pause to remove a pubic hair from my teeth, don't tell me I've just 'wrecked it' for you.
11. Leaving me in bed while you go play video games immediately afterwards is highly inadvisable if you would like my behaviour to be repeated in the future.
12. If you like how we do it, it's probably best not to speculate about the origins of our talent. Just enjoy the moment and be happy that we're good at it. See also rule #2 about gratitude.
13. No, it doesn't particularly taste good. And I don't care about the protein content.
14. No, I will NOT do it while you watch TV.
15. When you hear your friends complain about how they don't get blow jobs often enough, keep your mouth shut. It is inappropriate to either sympathize or brag.
16. Just because 'it's awake' when you get up does not mean I have to 'kiss it good morning.'

WHAT A MAN HAS TO SAY ON THE SUBJECT

1. First of all, yes you're obligated to do it. If you don't, we will find someone (younger, prettier and dirtier) who will.
2. Second, swallowing a teaspoon full of cream is a hell of a lot easier than licking a dead fish.
3. You want to talk about farting? Does the word 'queef' mean anything to you?
4. I will use your ears as I see fit. don't worry about it and be thankful I'm not pulling your hair.
5. When you're on your period, stuffing something in your mouth is the only way to stop you from bitching and moaning. Suck it up!
6. Speaking of which, if you are bleeding for five straight days, you need all the fluids you can get. Trust me.
7. You bitch about the taste, but trust me when I tell you that we get the short end of the stick in flavour country.
8. At least there is no danger of a dick bleeding in your mouth.
9. Play with the balls.
10. No matter how good you think you are at it, we've had better.
11. Caress the ass, too. We like that!
12. Make hay when the sun shines. It's "wide awake" in the morning now, but when you get old and fat and looking for some action, I gah-ron-tee it'll be "sound asleep."
13. If you swallow, then you don't have to worry about getting any on your face, now will you?


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post #2 of 10 (permalink) Old 07-15-2007, 09:50 AM
Lifer
 
Join Date: Oct 2004
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hmmm, i broke up with a chaick once cause she didnt give head.
i see now that was OK, lol
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post #3 of 10 (permalink) Old 07-15-2007, 06:44 PM
I hate ghetto niggers
 
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Oh, how it's all true.

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post #4 of 10 (permalink) Old 07-15-2007, 06:50 PM
Yes.....its a V6.
 
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Lmao!

These are the demands and sayings of Duncan.
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post #5 of 10 (permalink) Old 07-16-2007, 12:13 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by burnso03
8. Having my period does not mean that it's 'blow job week'

HAHA BLOW JOB WEEK!!!!!

Honey are you on your period yet? why!!!! because its blow job week!!!! hahaha





















that should be a national holiday!!!

Keepin' The Old School Alive
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post #6 of 10 (permalink) Old 07-16-2007, 09:53 AM
Dont Be Stupid
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by aCid
Oh, how it's all true.
oh yea...

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post #7 of 10 (permalink) Old 07-16-2007, 07:41 PM
 
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amen to that. i will NOT date anyone that doesn't swallow.
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post #8 of 10 (permalink) Old 07-18-2007, 03:41 PM
Rice User
 
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lol at #16
Yes you do, bitch!
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post #9 of 10 (permalink) Old 07-18-2007, 04:55 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by scootro
HAHA BLOW JOB WEEK!!!!!

Honey are you on your period yet? why!!!! because its blow job week!!!! hahaha

that should be a national holiday!!!

A week can't be a holiDAY....






But I agree it should be!

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post #10 of 10 (permalink) Old 07-18-2007, 09:39 PM
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lmao...all that is so true its hilarious



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