Try this if you get pulled over! - DFWstangs Forums
 
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post #1 of 16 (permalink) Old 03-09-2007, 09:28 AM Thread Starter
Time Served
 
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Try this if you get pulled over!

A police officer pulls a guy over for speeding and has the following exchange:

Officer: May I see your driver's license?

Driver: I don't have one. I had it suspended for speeding.

Officer: May I see the registration for this vehicle?

Driver: It's not my car. I stole it.

Officer: The car is stolen?

Driver: That's right. But come to think of it, I think I saw the registration in the glove box when I was putting my gun in there.

Officer: There's a gun in the glove box?

Driver: Yes officer. That's where I put it after I shot and killed the woman who owns this car and stuffed her in the trunk.

Officer: There's a BODY in the TRUNK?!?!?

Driver: Yes, officer.

Hearing this, the officer immediately called his backup. The car was quickly surrounded by police, and the captain approached the driver to handle the tense situation:

Captain: Sir, can I see your license?

Driver: Sure. Here it is.

It was valid.

Captain: Who's car is this?

Driver: It's mine, officer. Here's the registration papers.

Captain: Could you slowly open your glove box so I can see if there's a gun in it?

Driver: Yes, sir, but there's no gun in it.

Sure enough, there was nothing in the glove box.

Captain: Would you mind opening your trunk? I was told you said there's a body in it.

Driver: No problem.

Trunk is opened; no body.

Captain: I don't understand it. The officer who stopped you said you told him you didn't have a license, stole the car, had a gun in the glove box, and that there was a dead body in the trunk.

Driver: Yeah, I'll bet the lying bastard told you I was speeding, as well.

"And Shepherds we shall be
For thee, my Lord, for thee.
Power hath descended forth from Thy hand
Our feet may swiftly carry out Thy commands.
So we shall flow a river forth to Thee
And teeming with souls shall it ever be.
In Nomeni Patri Et Fili Spiritus Sancti."
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post #2 of 16 (permalink) Old 03-09-2007, 10:44 PM
I'll miss you Heather :(
 
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lol, good one
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post #3 of 16 (permalink) Old 03-09-2007, 11:04 PM
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cough cough REPOST
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post #4 of 16 (permalink) Old 03-10-2007, 05:28 PM
Lifer
 
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Good one
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post #5 of 16 (permalink) Old 03-10-2007, 05:36 PM
 
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Here's how it would go in the real world.

A police officer pulls a guy over for speeding and has the following exchange:

Officer: May I see your driver's license?

Driver: I don't have one. I had it suspended for speeding.

Officer: Go ahead and step out of the vehicle for me...

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post #6 of 16 (permalink) Old 03-10-2007, 08:19 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by pony_driven92
cough cough REPOST
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post #7 of 16 (permalink) Old 03-10-2007, 11:31 PM
 
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That was pretty good, but this does sound like the reality of the situation.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Kojak
Here's how it would go in the real world.

A police officer pulls a guy over for speeding and has the following exchange:

Officer: May I see your driver's license?

Driver: I don't have one. I had it suspended for speeding.

Officer: Go ahead and step out of the vehicle for me...

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post #8 of 16 (permalink) Old 03-12-2007, 09:12 PM
PAN
 
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None of you cops ever have a sense of humor...
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post #9 of 16 (permalink) Old 03-12-2007, 09:17 PM
Army Strong
 
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exellent

Quote:
Originally Posted by AL P View Post
There are two kinds of people in this world son, those that jerk off and those that lie about it.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Geor! View Post
Weird, cuz I'd rather be out on the streets sucking dick for crack than working!
http://www.phoenixtears.ca/ Cancer cure.
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post #10 of 16 (permalink) Old 03-12-2007, 09:18 PM
Ted
Opulance. I has it.
 
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Policeman don't have balls.
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post #11 of 16 (permalink) Old 03-12-2007, 09:27 PM
Sign I saw on the ground:
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Fox466
None of you cops ever have a sense of humor...
this would be a good time to insert the video where the guy runs up to the cop, giving him the finger, and the cop whips his ass w/ the night stick. That's his idea of having a sense of humor

Quote:
Originally Posted by Ted
Policeman don't have balls.
Sure they do. They keep them in their purses, next to their compact.

J/k, J/k, most cops deserve more respect than they will ever see.
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post #12 of 16 (permalink) Old 03-12-2007, 09:42 PM
Lifer
 
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that was good

IF YOU DON'T STAND BEHIND OUR TROOPS ~ FEEL FREE TO STAND IN FRONT OF THEM.
IN GOD WE TRUST
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post #13 of 16 (permalink) Old 03-12-2007, 09:43 PM
Ted
Opulance. I has it.
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by barronj

Sure they do. They keep them in their purses, next to their compact.

J/k, J/k, most cops deserve more respect than they will ever see.
I'm sorry, it was a punchline for another joke. I have to respect police officers. Both parents are DPD and Grandfather is retired FBI, but I do despise Irving PD and Plano PD.
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post #14 of 16 (permalink) Old 03-12-2007, 11:03 PM
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I'll have to give it try.

87 Hatch
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post #15 of 16 (permalink) Old 03-15-2007, 06:42 PM
insert something aqui
 
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hell nah, im mexican, i try that shit, ill get shot right after he ask for my license

1991 lx 5.0

lil ol 302

Back In The Jackstand Racing Crew!
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