Here's some more for ya
An old man was sitting on a bench at the mall. A young man walked up to the bench and sat down. He had spiked hair in all different colors: green, purple, red, orange, blue and yellow. The old man just stared and stared. Every time the young man looked, the old man was staring. Finally the young man said sarcastically, "What's the matter old timer... never done anything wild in your life?" Without batting an eye, the old man replied, "Got drunk once and had sex with a peacock. I was wondering if you were my son.
Leroy was a 17 year old ninth grader. Leroy got this homework assignment in his Ebonics class. All he had to do was use each of the following words in a sentence. The following is how he completed the assignment. Leroy got an "A".
OMELETTE: I should pop yo ass fo what you jus did, but omelette dis one slide.
BEFORE: Dere was five kids in my family, but then den one died, so now dere before.
RECTUM: I had two Cadillac's but my old lady rectum.
HOTEL: I gave my woman da crabs and da hotel everybody.
ODYSSEY: I told my bro, you odyssey da tits on that hoe.
STAIN: My mother-in-law axed me if I was stain for dinner again.
SELDOM: My cousin gave me two tickets to da Warriors game so I seldom.
PENIS: I went to da doctor and he handed me a cup and said penis.
FORECLOSE: If I pay alimony this month I'll have no money foreclose.
UNDERMINE: There's a fine looking hoe living in da apartment undermine.
TRIPOLI: I was gonna buy my old lady a bra but I couldn't find no Tripoli.
DISAPPOINTMENT: My parole officer told med if I miss disappointment he gonna kill me.
INCOME: I just got to bed wit dis hoe and income my wife.
HONOR: At da rape trial, da judge axed my bro, who be honor first?
FORTIFY: I axed da hoe how much? And she said fortify
ISRAEL: Alonzo tried to sell me a Rolex, I said man dat look fake. He said, no Leroy, Israel.