A man and his pet monkey enter a bar, and immediately are confronted by the bartender. You can't bring him in here. The man assured the bartender that he was well behaved, and would set by his side and drink beer with him. The bartender gave in and the monkey sat there and drank beer with his owner for about an hour when the man had to go to the pisser. Not knowing where his master was the monkey wheeled around and jumped from his stool to the pool table, picked up the cue ball and swallowed it. All hell broke loose and the bartender threw them both out.
A month or so passed and the pair re-entered the bar. After much pleading the bartender agreed to give them another chance. After a while the bartender began feeling sorry for the monkey as he was being so well-mannered. He grabbed a bowl of peanuts and pushed them to the monkey. As he watched the monkey take one after another and stick them up his butt and then pull'em out and eat'em. He asked the man what the hell he was doing. The man told the bartender that ever since their last visit the monkey checks everything for CLEARANCE!