A drunk goes into a bar and has a few more to keep the buzz going. Finally, he feels the need to take a dump and asks where the bathroom is. The bartender points him in the right direction, and he disappears for a while. A couple of minutes later, there's this blood curdling scream from the bathroom. All the bar patrons pause for a second, then slowly return to their conversations. A couple more seconds go by and there's another scream from the bathroom. The bartender runs in the bathroom to see what's the matter and says, "Hey man, what's all the fuss about...you're scaring all the patrons in the bar."
The drunk replies, "I'm sorry, but every time I try to flush the toilet, something comes up and bites me in the nuts."
The bartender replies, "You dumbass, that's because you're sitting on the mop bucket."
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