Two for the price of one! - DFWstangs Forums
 
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post #1 of 17 (permalink) Old 12-16-2003, 12:12 PM Thread Starter
 
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Two for the price of one!

Two old friends were just about to tee off at the first hole
of their local golf course when a chap carrying a golf bag
called out to them, "Do you mind if I join you? My partner
didn't show up."

"Sure," they said, "You're welcome."

Part way around the course, one of the friends asked the
newcomer, "What do you do for a living?"

"I'm a hit man," was the reply.

"You're joking!" was the response.

"No, I'm not," he said, reaching into his golf bag, and
pulling out a beautiful Martini sniper's rifle with a large
telescopic sight. "Here are my tools."

"That's a beautiful telescopic sight," said the other
friend, "Can I take a look? I think I might be able to see my
house from here."

So he picked up the rifle and looked through the sight in the
direction of his house. "Yeah, I can see my house all right.
This sight is fantastic. I can see right in the window. Wow,
I can see my wife in the bedroom. Ha Ha, I can see she's
naked! What's that? Wait a minute, that's my neighbor in there
with her... he's naked as well! The bi*ch!"

He turned to the hitman, "How much do you charge for a hit?"

"I do a flat rate - for you, one thousand dollars every time
I pull the trigger."

"Can you do two for me now?"

"Sure, what do you want?"

"First, shoot my wife, she's always been mouthy, so shoot her in the mouth.
Then the neighbor, he's a friend of mine, so just shoot his dick off to
teach him a lesson."

The hitman took the rifle and took aim, standing perfectly still
for a few minutes. "Are you going to do it or not?" said the
man impatiently.

"Just wait a moment, be patient," said the hitman calmly, "I
think I can save you a grand here..."

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post #2 of 17 (permalink) Old 12-16-2003, 12:18 PM
Texas Rangers #1
 
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LOL. Pretty funny, but probably belongs in the joke forum.
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post #3 of 17 (permalink) Old 12-16-2003, 12:26 PM
Poor Boy Racing
 
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That's pretty good.

92 Mustang GT.....a few things in the works.
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post #4 of 17 (permalink) Old 12-16-2003, 12:28 PM
Your Real DAD
 
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I like it

LOL
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post #5 of 17 (permalink) Old 12-16-2003, 12:31 PM
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LOL
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post #6 of 17 (permalink) Old 12-16-2003, 12:38 PM
A G RATED SITE!
 
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LMAO
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post #7 of 17 (permalink) Old 12-16-2003, 12:50 PM
93 Blk Coupe
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lol...
post #8 of 17 (permalink) Old 12-16-2003, 01:05 PM
American Badass
 
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LOL, good one.

'90 LX fastback 5.0 White with porno red interior. (SLOW PONY)
Classic Posts
Quote:
Originally Posted by Shaithis
"Still angry? A post like that makes me think you tasted someones dick at some point in your life."
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post #9 of 17 (permalink) Old 12-16-2003, 01:11 PM
Lifer
 
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LMAO!!
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post #10 of 17 (permalink) Old 12-16-2003, 01:51 PM
How you doin'
 
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Thumbs up

lol

...moving to the "Jokes" forum.

brad
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post #11 of 17 (permalink) Old 12-17-2003, 08:41 AM
 
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Quote:
Originally posted by Kenny_Stang
LOL. Pretty funny, but probably belongs in the joke forum.
Guess what you are in the joke forum. dumbass.
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post #12 of 17 (permalink) Old 12-17-2003, 09:21 AM
 
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Hahah that was a good one
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post #13 of 17 (permalink) Old 12-17-2003, 10:47 AM
insert something aqui
 
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rmlao
that was great

1991 lx 5.0

lil ol 302

Back In The Jackstand Racing Crew!
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post #14 of 17 (permalink) Old 12-17-2003, 11:30 AM
Merry HoHo
 
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Quote:
Originally posted by ta7series21
Guess what you are in the joke forum. dumbass.
i bet it was not at first

BTW good joke.

.(OBAMA) One Big Ass Mistake America
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post #15 of 17 (permalink) Old 12-21-2003, 11:29 PM
Lifer
 
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Quote:
Originally posted by ta7series21
Guess what you are in the joke forum. dumbass.
awww newbies are so cute sometimes when they dont know what the hell they are talking about
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post #16 of 17 (permalink) Old 12-22-2003, 12:03 AM
Lifer
 
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Quote:
Originally posted by junior
rmlao
that was great
wtf?
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post #17 of 17 (permalink) Old 12-24-2003, 10:40 AM
 
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lol i like that......he's so nice trying to save him a grand......great joke
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