Bathroom Smells Like Shit
GALENA PARK, TX—The second-floor men's room of a Sysco Vending office building smells like shit, disgusted employee Art McCune reported Friday. "Jesus Christ, it smells like actual human feces in here," McCune said. "I'm serious— it's like someone walked in, dropped his pants and underwear, straddled a bowl, excreted nearly a pound of fecal matter out of his anus, and then walked right out again." Building custodian Byron Withers apologized for the foul odor, assuring Sysco staffers that, by the following morning, the bathroom would be back to smelling like bleach.