Corny potato story
You know that all potatoes have eyes. Well, Mr. and Mrs. Potato had eyes
for each other, and finally they got married, and had a little sweet
potato, whom they called Yam.
Of course, they wanted the best for Yam. When it was time, they told her
about the facts of life.
They warned her about going out and getting half-baked, so she wouldn't
get accidentally mashed, and get a bad name for herself like Hot Potato,
and end up with a bunch of Tater Tots.
Yam said not to worry, no Spud would get her into the sack and make a
rotten potato out of her. But on the other hand she wouldn't stay home
and become a Couch Potato, either. She would get plenty of exercise so
as not to be skinny like her Shoestring cousins.
When she went off to Europe, Mr. and Mrs. Potato told Yam to watch out
for the hard-boiled guys from Ireland. And the greasy guys from France
called the French Fries. And when she went out west, to watch out for
the Indians so she wouldn't get scalloped. Yam said she would stay on
the straight and narrow and wouldn't associate with those high class
Yukon Golds, or the ones from the other side of the tracks who advertise
their trade on all the trucks that say, Frito Lay.
Mr. and Mrs. Potato sent Yam to Idaho P. U. (that's Potato University)
so that when she graduated she'd really be in the Chips. But in spite of
all they did for her, one day Yam came home and announced she was going
to marry Tom Brokaw. Tom Brokaw!
Mr. and Mrs. Potato were very upset. They told Yam she couldn't possibly
marry Tom Brokaw because he's just a...
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