WAL-MART Job Application:
> > > > > This is an actual job application > > > > that a 17 year old
> > > > > submitted to a Wal-Mart in Florida... And they hired him
> > > > > he was so honest and funny!
>NAME: Greg Bulmash.
>SEX: Not yet. Still waiting for the right person
>(or one who'll cooperate).
>DESIRED POSITION: Company's President or Vice President. But
>seriously, whatever's available. If I was in a position to be
>picky,I wouldn't be applying here in the first place.
>DESIRED SALARY: $185,000 a year plus stock options and a Michael Ovitz
>style severance package. If that's not possible, make a offer and we
>LAST POSITION HELD: Target for middle management hostility.
>SALARY: A lot less than I'm worth.
>MOST NOTABLE ACHIEVEMENT: My incredible collection o! f stolen
>pens and post-it notes. REASON FOR LEAVING: It sucked.
>HOURS AVAILABLE TO WORK: Any.
>PREFERRED HOURS: 1:30-3:30 p. m. Monday, Tuesday, and
>DO YOU HAVE ANY SPECIAL SKILLS?:Yes, but they're better suited to a
>MAY WE CONTACT YOUR CURRENT EMPLOYER?:If I had one, wouldn't I be
>DO YOU HAVE ANY PHYSICAL CONDITIONS THAT WOULD PROHIBIT YOU FROM
>TO 50 Lbs.?:Of what?
>DO YOU HAVE A CAR?: I think the more appropriate question
>here would be, "Do you have a car that runs?"
>HAVE YOU RECEIVED ANY SPECIAL AWARDS OR RECOGNITION?: I may already be
>winner of the Publishers
>DO YOU SMOKE?: On the job no, on my breaks yes.
>WHAT WOULD YOU LIKE TO BE DOING IN FIVE YEARS?:Living in the Bahamas
>fabulously wealthy, dumb, sexy,
>blonde supermodel who thinks I'M The Greatest Thing since
>sliced bread. Actually, I'd like to be doi! ng that now.
>DO YOU CERTIFY THAT THE ABOVE IS TRUE ANDCOMPLETE TO T HE BEST OF YOUR
>SIGN HERE: Aries.