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post #1 of 14 (permalink) Old 07-23-2003, 03:08 PM Thread Starter
Time Served
 
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Stupid People

> << Stupid people should have to wear signs that just say,
"I'm Stupid"*

That way you wouldn't rely on them, would you? * You wouldn't
ask them
anything.

It would be like, "Excuse me... oops, never mind, didn't see
your sign."

It's like before my wife and I moved. Our house was full of
boxes and there
was a U-Haul truck in our driveway. My neighbor comes over and
says "Hey,
you moving?" "Nope. * We just pack our stuff up once or twice
a week to see
how many boxes it takes. * Here's your sign."
> >
A couple of months ago I went fishing with a buddy of mine, we
pulled his
boat into the dock, I lifted up this big 'ol stringer of bass
and this idiot
on the dock goes, "Hey, y'all catch all them fish?"* "Nope.
Talked 'em into giving up. * Here's your sign."
> >
I was watching one of those animal shows on the Discovery
Channel. There was
a guy inventing a shark bite suit. * And there's only one way
to test it.
All right Jimmy, you got that shark suit on, it looks good...*
They want you
to jump into this pool of sharks, and you tell us if it hurts
when they bite
you."* "Well, all right, but hold my sign. * I don't wanna
lose
it.
> >
Last time I had a flat tire, I pulled my truck into one of
those
side-of-the-road gas stations. The attendant walks out, looks
at my truck,
looks at me, and I SWEAR he said, "Tire go flat?"* I couldn't
resist. *
I said, "Nope. I was driving around and those other three just
swelled right
up on me. * Here's your sign."
> >
We were trying to sell our car about a year ago. A guy came
over to the
house and drove the car around for about 45 minutes. * We get
back to the
house, he gets out of the car, reaches down and grabs the
exhaust pipe, then
says, Darn that's hot!"* See? If he'd been wearing his sign, I
could have
stopped him.
> >
> >I learned to drive an 18 wheeler in my days of adventure. *
Wouldn't you
know I misjudged the height of a bridge. The truck got stuck
and I couldn't
get it out no matter how I tried. * I radioed in for help and
eventually a
local cop shows up to take the report. * He went through his
basic
questioning..ok..no problem. * I thought sure he was clear of
needing a
sign...until he asked, So..is your truck stuck?"* I couldn't
help
myself! I looked at him, looked back at the rig and then back
to him and
said "no I'm delivering' a bridge ... here's your sign."
> >
> >I stayed late at work one night and a coworker looked at me
and said
"Are you still here?"* I replied, 'No. I left about 10 minutes
ago. * Here's
your sign."
> >
> >Anybody you know need a sign today? Send this to all your
friends. *
The next time someone says something stupid ask them where
their sign is.
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post #2 of 14 (permalink) Old 07-23-2003, 03:09 PM
Blue5spd's a titty baby
 
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Plagiarism

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post #3 of 14 (permalink) Old 07-23-2003, 03:15 PM
tired
 
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Quote:
Originally posted by cool cat
Plagiarism


lol
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post #4 of 14 (permalink) Old 07-23-2003, 04:09 PM
Where's he at?
 
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I've know a few people to say some stupid things before

L P C
marcs30thzdfw
User Id: 23544
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post #5 of 14 (permalink) Old 07-23-2003, 04:53 PM
Lifer
 
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I can't remember whos material that is but I'm thinking George Carlin??
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post #6 of 14 (permalink) Old 07-23-2003, 05:53 PM
Blue5spd's a titty baby
 
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Bill Engvall i think.

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post #7 of 14 (permalink) Old 07-23-2003, 06:15 PM
 
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Jeff Foxworthy has done that act before.
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post #8 of 14 (permalink) Old 07-23-2003, 06:28 PM
Blue5spd's a titty baby
 
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Bill Engvall actually put it on one of his cd's. He and Foxworthy are friends so maybe Jeff did write it.

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post #9 of 14 (permalink) Old 07-23-2003, 06:29 PM
 
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Quote:
Jeff Foxworthy has done that act before.
I second that....and it was a LOOOONG time ago too. I'm thinking I was in 8th or 9th grade when I hear that and I'm graduating college in 3 weeks, still funny though
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post #10 of 14 (permalink) Old 07-23-2003, 09:46 PM
five liter chevy eater
 
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ok just for the record, it is bill engvall. yes him and jeff are friends but that is bill's material. jeff does the "you might be a redneck" they both sound the same on radio, but if you have not seen it, go rent the BLUE COLLAR COMEDY TOUR it has both jeff, bill, larry the cable guy and ron white. it is funny as hell too


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post #11 of 14 (permalink) Old 07-24-2003, 12:02 PM
wishin i had a fast car
 
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they are still funny as hell
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post #12 of 14 (permalink) Old 07-24-2003, 06:24 PM
Still got Nothing
 
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<--- Didn't read it but hates stupid people.
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post #13 of 14 (permalink) Old 08-07-2003, 01:04 AM
Time Served
 
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LOL! DAMN IDIOTS!
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post #14 of 14 (permalink) Old 08-07-2003, 06:56 PM
Married Man on 14Feb2010
 
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