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post #1 of 5 (permalink) Old 09-24-2001, 10:37 AM Thread Starter
Merry HoHo
 
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joke

A couple of Alabama hunters are out in the woods when one of them falls to the ground.

He doesn't seem to be breathing, his eyes are rolled back in his head.

The other guy whips out his cell phone and calls 911. He gasps to the operator, "My friend is dead! What can I do?"

The operator, in a calm soothing voice says, "Just take it easy. I can help. First, lets make sure he's dead."

There is a silence, then a shot is heard.

The guy's voice comes back on the line. He says, "OK, now what?
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post #2 of 5 (permalink) Old 09-24-2001, 10:38 AM Thread Starter
Merry HoHo
 
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The Lone Ranger and Tonto are riding across the plains when Tonto suddenly stops, climbs down off his horse and puts his ear to the ground.

The Lone Ranger waits a few seconds before asking Tonto, "What is it?"

"Buffalo come," Tonto replied.

"How can you tell?"

"Ear sticky."
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post #3 of 5 (permalink) Old 09-24-2001, 10:39 AM Thread Starter
Merry HoHo
 
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A young journalism student at the University of Tennessee was assigned to write a human interest story.

He went into the mountains to do some research. There, he found an old farmer sitting on his porch, introduced himself, and explained his mission.

The young man asked, "Has anything ever happened around here that made you really happy?"

After a moment, the farmer said, "Yeah, one time my neighbor's daughter, a fine looking gal, got lost. We formed a posse and found her. After we all screwed her, we took her back home."

"I can't print that!" the young man exclaimed. "Can't you think of anything else that happened that made you happy?"

The farmer thought for a minute and smiled, "Yep! One time a neighbor's sheep got lost. We formed a posse and found it. Then we all screwed it and took it back home."

Again, the young man said "I can't print that, either. Let's try another approach. Has anything ever happened around here that made you really sad?"

The old farmer dropped his head as if he were ashamed, and after a few seconds he looked up timidly at the young man and said, "This one time, I got lost..."
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post #4 of 5 (permalink) Old 09-25-2001, 03:00 PM
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post #5 of 5 (permalink) Old 09-30-2001, 05:40 AM
Junkyard Turbo Power
 
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thats an aggie joke



there is a fine line between a hobby.... and mental illness.
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