Are you tired of all those sissy, mushy
"friendship" poems that always sound good but
never actually come close to reality? Well, here
is a series of promises that really speaks to true
1. When you are sad ...I will get you drunk
and will help you plot revenge against the sorry
bastard who made you sad.
2. When you are blue ...I'll try to dislodge
whatever is choking you.
3. When you smile ...I'll know you finally got laid.
4. When you are scared ...I will rag on you
about it every chance I get.
5. When you are worried ...I will tell you horrible stories
about how much worse it could be and to quit whining.
6. When you are confused ...I will use little words to
7. When you are sick ...stay away from me until you're well
again. I don't want whatever you have.
8. When you fall ...I will point and laugh at your clumsy
This is my oath, I pledge 'til the end. Why, you may ask?
Because you're my friend!