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post #2 of (permalink) Old 07-31-2004, 01:09 AM
Small Fry
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Join Date: Mar 2001
Location: The Keebler Tree
Posts: 10,287
Originally Posted by venomviper69
This is kinda embarrassing but i really need some good christian suggestions to help me through this. I have had a girlfriend for about 2 years now and I honestly love her. We talk all the time about getting married, kids ect. My problem is the fact that I cant seem to stop lookin and every once and a while being with other girls. I have cheated and i know its bad and afterwords feel bad but i just sometimes cant control it and the wrong head wins the moral fight. I REALLY dont want to lose her and would be devastated. I know that if i cant stop this now that eventually I will A- Get caught or B- be a cheater through my whole life and never be able to stop it. I am pretty sure looking is normal for any 19 year old male but the real problem is the "acting" on that and how to stop it. I really need some help and would appreciate any real helpful awnsers. Thanks guys and God Bless.
1 Thessalonians 4:3-5,7
It is God's will that you should be sanctified: that you should avoid sexual immorality; that each of you should learn to control his own body in a way that is holy and honorable, not in passionate lust like the heathen, who do not know God. For God did not call us to be impure, but to live a holy life.

Sexual sin is by far the most difficult to defeat for guys. (usually) But just like anything you can defeat your urges. You say you love this girl, yet you cannot be faithful to her. In your current situation of not being able to control yourself, it would not be right for you to get married. You need to fix this problem first. You have to train yourself to not stray. You can pray to God for forgiveness, and strength to help you, but you will have to make the major effort to change. Do not put or let yourself be put into situations where you can cheat. Do not pursue other girls and if they pursue you, make your "taken" status know right up front and then walk away. This girl you say you love deserves much better. I assume she does not know of the cheating. Although I'm sure you don't want to hear this, if you really love her, you need to come clean. You cannot build a marriage without trust.

1 Corinthians 6:18-20
Flee from sexual immorality. All other sins a man commits are outside his body, but he who sins sexually sins against his own body. Do you not know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit, who is in you, whom you have received from God? You are not your own; you were bought at a price. Therefore honor God with your body.

You can change, but you have to make a decision to do so and stick to it. You can do it.
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