When I was putting on weight, I was eating 6 meals a day and they were all pretty huge. The size of my lunch/dinner doubled, and my "snacks" were the size of my old lunchs/dinners. I also got up at 2 AM every night and drank half a protein shake. Now, you guys seem like even harder gainers than me, but you really can't eat enough. Keep the meals healthy and with useful calories, but I got to the point where I was eating to discomfort at every sitting.
Protein shakes and weight gainers help alleviate that discomfort by packing good calories into a small serving size. I'm not saying you have to feel like you're going to puke after ever meal (like I did), but in 99.9999% of people who can't gain a pound to save their life, they aren't eating enough.
3 meals is a better way to go about it as it slows down your metabolism...but it also makes it that much harder to get those extra calories in the day.
In terms of lifting, I'm a huge fan of the 5x5 and the 4x8, that's what most of my exercises fall into. Sometimes I'll go with a 3x15. I just like to mix it up. Yes, lesser reps are more geared toward bulk but really the bulk will come more with diet than the amount of sets/reps you decide on.
Also, I've found that I don't like working to failure anymore. I used to always workout a major muscle group once a week and go to failure with it but I've found that taxed my CNS too much. I was having to do my Army PT and playing IM sports while I was working out 4 days a week, so to keep from overtraining I would NOT go to failure. This allowed me to keep doing my other physical commitments and also I could weight train the same muscle group twice a week.