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Old 05-30-2001, 03:51 PM   #1
SNEAKY
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Location: User Id: 30310 Name: SneakyDaPimp
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Mildred and Chester knew each other from childhood but were in their nineties when they got married because they had to wait for Mildred's mother to pass away first.

Back in those days there was no hanky panky before marriage so Chester and Mildred were both still virgins. Needless to say, Chester was pretty excited on their wedding night, having waited so patiently all these years.

However, Mildred was very apprehensive as she had developed a heart condition and would have to tell Chester that they could not do IT.

Chester is now sitting on the bed wanting Mildred to hurry up. He detects a little reluctance on her part. Thinking that she is shy, he sends her off to the bathroom to get undressed.

When she reappears in her silk nightie, he gets her to sit next to him on the bed. Not knowing how to get things started, he pulls the first strap on her nightie.

She blushes just as red as her silk nightie. Now she is really concerned about telling Chester about her heart condition.

In the meantime, Chester is looking at the first breast he has seen since his own mother's. It is hanging there down to her belly button; gravity having taken it's course over some ninety years.

He realizes her anxiety but figures she is going to have to be helped a little more. Now he pulls the second strap and sees the second breast unroll downward before him.

Poor Mildred is now beside herself. She is going to have to tell Chester about her heart condition. With a quivering voice and mustering up all her courage, she says, "Chester, I have acute angina."

Chester says, "I sure hope so......your tits look like hell!"



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89 5.0 COUPE,LOOKS KINDA INNOCENT BUT RUNS 7.71@88MPH WITH 1.61 SIXTY FOOT TIMES IN THE 1/8 WITH JUST A 120 SHOT OF NOS. http://24.17.129.131/billy.htm 3.73, FACTORY FIVE CONTROL ARMS, LAKEWOOD SLAPPERS BARS, FMS DRIVE SHAFT, MAC 1 5/8 EQUAL LENGTH HEADERS, OFF ROAD PIPE, WARLOCK MUFFLERS, GT40 INTAKE, FMS E303 CAM, K&N PANEL FILTER, RELOCATED ACT SENSOR, NOS DRY SHOT
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Old 05-31-2001, 02:11 AM   #2
ProStarPony
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EEEEEEEEWWWWWWWWW..... Grandma Bags. :-(*)
Well damnit, the damn smilie face didnt throw up for me. Oh well, you know what its supposed to be now.
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90 Lx Hatch
SHOW~
Mineral Grey Paint, Clear Corners, Chrome Ponies, Eibachs, Steeda Grille Insert, No Wing.
GO~
373's, Shorties, Offroad H, Flows, Dumps, Subs, ST Brace, Underdrives, Aluninum Driveshaft, Tri-Ax, K&N.
More to come.

[This message has been edited by PrimerPony (edited 05-31-2001).]
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