Who Is Jack Schitt?

05-29-2001, 08:31 AM

WHO IS JACK SCHITT

For some time many of us have wondered just who is Jack Schitt? We find ourselves at a loss when someone says, "You don't know Jack Schitt!" Well, thanks to my genealogy efforts, you can now respond in an intellectual way. Jack Schitt is the only son of Awe Schitt. Awe Schitt, the fertilizer magnate, married O. Schitt, the owner of Needeep N. Schitt, Inc. They had one son, Jack. In turn, Jack Schitt married Noe Schitt. The deeply religious couple produced six children: Holie Schitt, Giva Schitt, Fulla Schitt, Bull Schitt, and the twins Deep Schitt and Dip Schitt. Against her parents' objections, Deep Schitt married Dumb Schitt, a high school dropout. After being married 15 years, Jack and Noe Schitt divorced. Noe Schitt later married Ted Sherlock, and because her kids were living withthem, she wanted to keep her previous name. She was then known as Noe Schitt Sherlock. Meanwhile, Dip Schitt married Loda Schitt, and they produced a son with a rather nervous disposition named Chicken Schitt. Two of the other six children, Fulla Schitt and Giva Schitt, were inseparable throughout childhood and subsequently married the Happens brothers in a dual ceremony. The wedding announcement in the newspaper announced the Schitt-happens nuptials. The Schitt-Happens children were Dawg, Byrd, and Horse. Bull Schitt, the prodigal son, left home to tour the world. He recently returned from Italy with his new alian bride, Pisa Schitt. Now when someone says, "You don't know Jack Schitt," you can correct them.

Sincerely, Crock O. Schitt

SNEAKY · 05-29-2001, 09:48 AM

lmfao,that is a bunch of $hit

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89 5.0 COUPE,LOOKS KINDA INNOCENT BUT RUNS 7.71@88MPH WITH 1.61 SIXTY FOOT TIMES IN THE 1/8 WITH JUST A 120 SHOT OF NOS.

http://24.17.129.131/billy.htm 3.73, FACTORY FIVE CONTROL ARMS, LAKEWOOD SLAPPERS BARS, FMS DRIVE SHAFT, MAC 1 5/8 EQUAL LENGTH HEADERS, OFF ROAD PIPE, WARLOCK MUFFLERS, GT40 INTAKE, FMS E303 CAM, K&N PANEL FILTER, RELOCATED ACT SENSOR, NOS DRY SHOT

05-29-2001, 09:56 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by SNEAKY:
lmfao,that is a bunch of $hit

No Sh!t.

jluv · 05-29-2001, 03:25 PM

I think I know his cousin Gotekka.

ProStarPony · 05-29-2001, 09:41 PM

I saw that on a T shirt in the Parks Mall at Gadzooks one day.

That stuff is funny every time you read it.

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90 Lx Hatch
SHOW~
Mineral Grey Paint, Clear Corners, Chrome Ponies, Eibachs, Steeda Grille Insert, No Wing.
GO~
373's, Shorties, Offroad H, Flows, Dumps, Subs, ST Brace, Underdrives, Aluninum Driveshaft, Tri-Ax, K&N.
More to come.

05-29-2001, 08:31 AM	#1
NoStangYet Guest Posts: n/a	Who Is Jack Schitt? WHO IS JACK SCHITT For some time many of us have wondered just who is Jack Schitt? We find ourselves at a loss when someone says, "You don't know Jack Schitt!" Well, thanks to my genealogy efforts, you can now respond in an intellectual way. Jack Schitt is the only son of Awe Schitt. Awe Schitt, the fertilizer magnate, married O. Schitt, the owner of Needeep N. Schitt, Inc. They had one son, Jack. In turn, Jack Schitt married Noe Schitt. The deeply religious couple produced six children: Holie Schitt, Giva Schitt, Fulla Schitt, Bull Schitt, and the twins Deep Schitt and Dip Schitt. Against her parents' objections, Deep Schitt married Dumb Schitt, a high school dropout. After being married 15 years, Jack and Noe Schitt divorced. Noe Schitt later married Ted Sherlock, and because her kids were living withthem, she wanted to keep her previous name. She was then known as Noe Schitt Sherlock. Meanwhile, Dip Schitt married Loda Schitt, and they produced a son with a rather nervous disposition named Chicken Schitt. Two of the other six children, Fulla Schitt and Giva Schitt, were inseparable throughout childhood and subsequently married the Happens brothers in a dual ceremony. The wedding announcement in the newspaper announced the Schitt-happens nuptials. The Schitt-Happens children were Dawg, Byrd, and Horse. Bull Schitt, the prodigal son, left home to tour the world. He recently returned from Italy with his new alian bride, Pisa Schitt. Now when someone says, "You don't know Jack Schitt," you can correct them. Sincerely, Crock O. Schitt

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05-29-2001, 09:48 AM	#2
SNEAKY Merry HoHo Join Date: Apr 2001 Location: User Id: 30310 Name: SneakyDaPimp Posts: 31,985	lmfao,that is a bunch of $hit ------------------ 89 5.0 COUPE,LOOKS KINDA INNOCENT BUT RUNS 7.71@88MPH WITH 1.61 SIXTY FOOT TIMES IN THE 1/8 WITH JUST A 120 SHOT OF NOS. http://24.17.129.131/billy.htm 3.73, FACTORY FIVE CONTROL ARMS, LAKEWOOD SLAPPERS BARS, FMS DRIVE SHAFT, MAC 1 5/8 EQUAL LENGTH HEADERS, OFF ROAD PIPE, WARLOCK MUFFLERS, GT40 INTAKE, FMS E303 CAM, K&N PANEL FILTER, RELOCATED ACT SENSOR, NOS DRY SHOT

05-29-2001, 03:25 PM	#4
jluv Black or white? Join Date: May 2001 Posts: 16,163	I think I know his cousin Gotekka.

05-29-2001, 09:41 PM	#5
ProStarPony DRAMA FREE! Join Date: Feb 2001 Location: West Dallas Biatch!! a.k.a. Oak Cliff Posts: 3,958	I saw that on a T shirt in the Parks Mall at Gadzooks one day. That stuff is funny every time you read it. ------------------ 90 Lx Hatch SHOW~ Mineral Grey Paint, Clear Corners, Chrome Ponies, Eibachs, Steeda Grille Insert, No Wing. GO~ 373's, Shorties, Offroad H, Flows, Dumps, Subs, ST Brace, Underdrives, Aluninum Driveshaft, Tri-Ax, K&N. More to come.