Bandit_52632
08-28-2002, 03:55 AM
:rolleyes: :eek:
Words of wisdom from Toilet Walls : -
Some people come to sit and think.
Others come to shit and stink.
I come here to rest my balls and
Read the words upon the walls.
Everybody pisses on the floor. Be a hero and shit on the ceiling.
I FUCKED YOUR MOTHER!
to which someone else wrote:
GO HOME DAD YOU'RE DRUNK!
(Sign posted in a bathroom: )
We aim to please!
You aim too! Please!
Seen above a urinal:
Please do not throw cigarette butts in our urinal.
We don't piss in your ashtrays!
I do not like this place at all:
The seat is too high and the hole is too small.
[In another handwriting]
You open yourself to a simple retort:
Your ass is too big and your legs are too short.
Written on the toilet paper dispenser: 'This toilet paper is like
Clint Eastwood; They're both rough and tough and don't take shit off of
anybody!'
On the inside of a toilet door:
Patrons are requested to remain seated throughout the entire performance.
Our aim is to keep the toilet clean. Your aim would be appreciated.
Written above a urinal in the mens restroom:
We are urinals! We don't take no shit!
In one persons handwriting -
I love Amy M.
In someone elses right below it -
Who hasn't?
Written on a bathroom wall:
"Question Authority"
and written beneath it:
"Why?"
A sign I saw at a swimming pool once:
We don't swim in your toilet,
so please don't pee in our pool!
Another sign seen at a swimming pool:
Welcome to our ool.
Notice there's no P in it.
Please keep it that way.
In days of old
When knights were bold
And paper wasn't invented
They'd wipe their ass
On a clump of grass
And walk away contented
For a good time, call ###-#### and ask for Mary.
For a BAD time, tell Mary where you got this number.
As you sit to take a shit
Rest a while and think a bit.
The last time that I beat my meat,
Was on this very toilet seat.
Sign over urinal in mens room in Cambridge, Mass. bar near Harvard:
We don't sell our beer, we just rent it.
Sign seen at a restaurant:
The hands that clean these toilets also make your food...please aim
properly.
Here I sit, I'm at a loss
trying to shit out taco sauce.
When it comes, I hope and pray,
I don't blow my ass away.
You're holding your future in your hands!
Someone had added:
And it doesn't look too promising!
(written above a urinal)
Why are you looking up here?
Are you ashamed of it?
If your hose is too short,
Or your pump is too weak,
You'd better stand close,
Or you'll pee on the seat.
Words of wisdom from Toilet Walls : -
Some people come to sit and think.
Others come to shit and stink.
I come here to rest my balls and
Read the words upon the walls.
Everybody pisses on the floor. Be a hero and shit on the ceiling.
I FUCKED YOUR MOTHER!
to which someone else wrote:
GO HOME DAD YOU'RE DRUNK!
(Sign posted in a bathroom: )
We aim to please!
You aim too! Please!
Seen above a urinal:
Please do not throw cigarette butts in our urinal.
We don't piss in your ashtrays!
I do not like this place at all:
The seat is too high and the hole is too small.
[In another handwriting]
You open yourself to a simple retort:
Your ass is too big and your legs are too short.
Written on the toilet paper dispenser: 'This toilet paper is like
Clint Eastwood; They're both rough and tough and don't take shit off of
anybody!'
On the inside of a toilet door:
Patrons are requested to remain seated throughout the entire performance.
Our aim is to keep the toilet clean. Your aim would be appreciated.
Written above a urinal in the mens restroom:
We are urinals! We don't take no shit!
In one persons handwriting -
I love Amy M.
In someone elses right below it -
Who hasn't?
Written on a bathroom wall:
"Question Authority"
and written beneath it:
"Why?"
A sign I saw at a swimming pool once:
We don't swim in your toilet,
so please don't pee in our pool!
Another sign seen at a swimming pool:
Welcome to our ool.
Notice there's no P in it.
Please keep it that way.
In days of old
When knights were bold
And paper wasn't invented
They'd wipe their ass
On a clump of grass
And walk away contented
For a good time, call ###-#### and ask for Mary.
For a BAD time, tell Mary where you got this number.
As you sit to take a shit
Rest a while and think a bit.
The last time that I beat my meat,
Was on this very toilet seat.
Sign over urinal in mens room in Cambridge, Mass. bar near Harvard:
We don't sell our beer, we just rent it.
Sign seen at a restaurant:
The hands that clean these toilets also make your food...please aim
properly.
Here I sit, I'm at a loss
trying to shit out taco sauce.
When it comes, I hope and pray,
I don't blow my ass away.
You're holding your future in your hands!
Someone had added:
And it doesn't look too promising!
(written above a urinal)
Why are you looking up here?
Are you ashamed of it?
If your hose is too short,
Or your pump is too weak,
You'd better stand close,
Or you'll pee on the seat.