Limmericks

[0 GT 2]

I don't know why, but I still like these.

There once was a fellow McSweeny
Who spilled some gin on his weenie
Just to be couth
He added vermouth
Then slipped his girlfriend a martini

[line-em-up]

Don't forget this classic.

There once was a man from Nantucket
Whose dick was so long he could suck it.
And he said with a grin
As he wiped off his chin,
"If my ear were a cunt, I would fuck it."

[JESmith]

There once was a couple from New Delhi
Who now walk belly to belly
In their haste they laid waste
And used library paste
Instead of petroleum jelly

[CoorsLightCoupe]

There once was a couple from New Delhi
Who now walk belly to belly
In their haste they laid waste
And used library paste
Instead of petroleum jelly

LOL being as my last name is Kelly, there has been an ongoing joke that this is the family limerick...

"There once was a couple named Kelly
Who went though life belly-to-belly
Because in their haste,
they used library paste
Instead of petroleum jelly"

Here are a few of my favorites:

"Behold!" Quoth Willy The Bard
"My cock hangeth down half a yard!
And forsooth with the aid
of 'yon big titted maid
'twill get even longer when hard!"

Nymphomaniacal Jill
Used a dynomite stick for a thrill
They found her vagina
in north carolina
and bits of her tits in brazil

There once was a dentist named Sloan
Who saw all his patients alone
In a fit of depravity
he filled the wrong cavity
and my how his business has grown!

There once was a man from Devises
Whos testes were two different sizes
The one was so small
it was no ball at all
But the other one won several prizes!

There once was a man named Cass
Whos balls were made out of brass
When the jingled together
they played 'stormy weather'
and lightning shot out of his ass!